It’s a theme day, today! Check out the bonus songs as well.
“The Twelve Days of Christmas”
By John Denver and the Muppets
A friend once told me a remake of Christmas song is only good if it’s performed by the Muppets. While I don’t totally agree (otherwise I’d not be doing this entire list), there is some truth that the Muppets version of a holiday song is the definitive remake.
There are actually two versions of this song. One is from the 1979 TV special “John Denver and the Muppets: A Christmas Together”. The other is from the soundtrack album for the show. Of the two, I prefer the album version simply because it’s the one I’ve heard the most. The album was released on every format around (save for possibly 8-track), and the TV special hasn’t aired in decades and has never seen an official video release, which COME ON DISNEY PUT THAT ON DISNEY+ RIGHT NOW.
The record album was a staple growing up. I’d listen to that multiple times every Christmas, although I was at the mercy of my parents loading it in the stack of their own Christmas albums. When I finally got it on CD, I was excited only to find out the album was missing two songs. Took a few years for that mistake to be corrected.
There is not a bad song on the album. And you could make the case this is the definitive version of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”. John Denver and all the Muppets join together to sing the familiar lyrics, but with their own personalities infused into their performances.
The highlight has to be Miss Piggy, who gets the “Five Golden Rings” verse. She sings it with gusto, and on the later verses adds the vocal percussion “Ba dum bum bum”. On the eleventh verse, she gives that her all, and my brother and I would mimic that all night long.
This song is one of the stranger Christmas carols. It makes no sense why someone would give these gifts and in such numbers. The song meter changes all the time. It can be lengthy if you don’t have the right arrangement to keep it moving.
Thankfully, the Muppets keep it rollicking along, and their own zaniness just adds to the wonderful strangeness that is “The Twelve Days of Christmas.”
BONUS TRACK #1
“The Twelve Days of Christmas”
By Bob and Doug Mackenzie
This version of the song comes from those two hosers from “SCTV.” From their album “Great White North”, Rick Moranis as Bob and Dave Thomas as Doug sing the song with their own lyrics. And it quickly, hilariously goes off the rails.
From the first gift of a beer (in a tree) to five golden touques to eight comic books, the gifts are uniquely Canadian. As a kid, I heard this on the radio when an AM DJ played one comedy Christmas song every hour for the month of December. I didn’t understand it fully but I laughed at their delivery and laughed at a beer. Later I would watch Strange Brew and would learn more “SCTV” and the actors and I developed a greater appreciation of the song.
That wasn’t the only version of the song that DJ played, though….
BONUS TRACK #2
“The Twelve Pains of Christmas”
By Bob Rivers
One of the other comedy songs the DJ played was this one. Done by long time comedian Bob Rivers, this was his comedic take on what the holidays were really about — all the pains and havoc people go through.
I instantly took to liking this song because in one of the verses a kid screams he wants a Transformer for Christmas.
What can I say, it was on brand.
This was by far my favorite of Bob Rivers’ holiday comedy songs. I bought the album, “Twisted Christmas” a year or two after first hearing it. I enjoyed most of the songs on that album, and many of the songs on his other albums, although I found his newer stuff didn’t compare to the older songs.
Still, this will always be a favorite version of mine.
Tomorrow – that dang last note.

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